Chapter 1- Don't Sweat the Small Stuff |
Chapter 2- Make Peace with Imperfection |
Since the start of online school, I have been overwhelmed with work online, zoom calls crashing, and I have been getting so worked out about every little setback I have while trying to get through one day of distance learning. Whether I can’t get on my zoom in time because my screen says its connecting for 5 minutes, or I get kicked out randomly in the middle of a breakout room doing a project, or my computer crashes because I have a zoom meeting running split screen while I have multiple other tabs open doing work for my class; I have been sweating far to much on all these small things after the first week of distance learning. Most of these things are out of my control, considering they all rely on either the ability of my internet, the internet at the highschool, and my computer. All of this stuff is brand new anyway so there is obviously going to be bumps along the way as the teachers are trying to figure out how to teach all their material online through zoom calls, google classroom, quizizz, and more. So whenever I get worked up about these small things, I need to remember to take a deep breath in and keep my head up, knowing that things will get better eventually. And as always, staying positive will also help the bad will go by much quicker.
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My ego distracts me in my school work, golf game, and social life. I am constantly trying to be the best at what I am doing which is good but sometimes I focus too much on the mindset that, “I need to do more because the work I put in is good enough.” This creates a toxic drive where I am constantly hating on myself, even after I accomplish something. For example in golf, I practice almost everyday, work with my coach on drills and technique, play in tournaments, and when I have one bad day I automatically start doubting my abilities which offsets all of the work I just put in. Even when I score and place well in a tourney, I immediately compare myself to everyone else and find any way possible to prove to myself that I am still not good enough. I have been struggling with this anxiety for awhile, but I’ve learned that one bad day doesn’t determine who you are as a player, and as long as I continue to put the work in I will reach my goals one day. I am trying to be more positive in life hoping it will boost my self-esteem and make me have more confidence in myself, because another way my ego distracts me by the judgment of other people. If my ego is low and I don’t have any confidence in myself (self love) I will be less likely to reach out to new people, try new things, and show people what I am capable of.
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Chapter 3- Let go of the Idea that Gentle, Relaxed People Can't be Superachievers |
Chapter 4- Be Aware of the Snowball Effect of Your Thinking |
This quote makes perfect sense because one of the main reasons why we as leaders are constantly so stressed is that we worry too much about every single detail. We focus on, like the quote said, “our wants, desires, needs, and concerns,” which limits us from reaching our goals and full potential. I also think as leaders, we focus a lot on other people's concerns, desires, and needs because we are constantly trying to get their approval and make their opinion feel valued. Doing these things makes it hard for us to obtain internal peace, but taking the time to do simple things such as only focusing on what you can control, meditating, and being true to yourself will all help you reach internal peace. Once you have what you want, you will be able to stay calm in stressful situations which allows you to stride towards your goals in a much easier and more focused way. This way of living also conserves so much more of your energy, Fearful thinking takes so much energy and productivity out of your day. I also think that it is harder to work to your fullest ability when your mind is in a million different places. Distraction leads to worrying which leads to stress.
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Many things happen when I let my mind take over my body and overthink everything, but the main thing I feel when my thinking is in control is an extra weight on my head and shoulders. I’ll get a super bad headache and can not focus on just one thing because too many little ideas are in my head at the same time. It almost feels like something is pulsing back and forth or my heart is just beating so loud I can hear every beat in my head. I struggle with solving his problem, and I haven’t quite found a technique to calm myself down in these situations. Sometimes I will listen to different types of music genres depending on what’s overwhelming me and what I am feeling. If my thoughts are making me stressed I sometimes listen to calming music, but sometimes I also need to get out my anger with loud rock. Either way this music de-stressor isn’t the most efficient, and most of the time I still have to deal with the pressure from my thoughts afterward.
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Chapter 5- Develop Your Compassion |
Chapter 6- Remind Yourself that When You Die, Your "In Basket" Won't Be Empty |
I feel like it is very easy for teenagers to make small things into a big deal nowadays, especially as our world revolves around social media and the need for others approval. We are constantly comparing ourselves to other people we see on social media platforms, whether it is how we look, what we wear, or where we live. This has become very toxic and causes extremely mental health issues to certain people. I find myself making a big deal about what I post or who posted what with who, when in the end none of that matters. This absorption in other people's lives and opinions just ends up making me feel drained at the end of the day, and I know for a fact I am not gaining any greater skill of compassion from it. Social media has made me more self absorbed by making me now worry about how I like in pictures all the time or what choice of words I use so I don’t sound “cringy” or “uncool.” I think that I am constantly making small things into big deals on a daily basis and the only way to stop it is by decreasing my amount of time spent on social media.
Chapter 7- Don't Interrupt Other or Finish Their SentencesPersonally, I feel like nobody is a perfect listener because it is so hard to give someone your full attention 24/7. There is constantly going to be other thoughts running through your brain while someone is talking to you and you can not control that, but blatantly being disrespectful to the person who is talking by not making eye contact or interrupting them is unacceptable. I think that I could improve on my listening skills, however not in the way that I need to be more respectful, but that I need to be patient enough to let them finish and explain all the details. When someone is giving me a task to do, I especially struggle with this by letting some of the instructions go in one ear and out the other. Once I hear the first few instructions I immediately switch my attention towards the task. I also feel like since I am so busy it is hard for me to focus my attention on one specific thing when there are multiple distractions in my head. With our generation being attached to their screens all of the time watching videos or looking at picture on social media, our attention span has decreased immensely. This could also be one of the main reasons why it is so hard for teenagers to focus for longer periods of time nowadays.
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My “in basket” consists of daily homework, which is considered my job as a student, golf practice and play time, golf tournaments, and any other chores or things that need to be done around the house. I fit time in hanging out with my friends and family after I have completed all of the things in my “in basket,” which is not a lot of time. Not only do I have little time for family and friends, but I have even less time for myself. It is very unhealthy to not spend time taking care of yourself, as you might be working yourself too hard. I think I focus too much on getting everything done verus enjoying the steps you take to get there. I am constantly focusing on the future and what I need to do in order to achieve my goals instead of living in the now with the ones I love. It isn’t bad to have goals and work towards something, but it isn’t good to let those goals control you if you are trying to obtain inner peace. I think certain parts of my “in basket” will be there tomorrow, but I will try to shorten my list of things to do, for I should not be living off of a checklist.
Chapter 8- Do Something Nice for Someone Else- an Don't Tell Anyone About ItDepending on the situation, I feel like it can be normal to expect acknowledgement when doing a good deed. Now, a completely selfless person would probably disagree and think that you should never do things for someone's gratification and acknowledgement. However, when you are giving to someone you know, such as your friends or family, it seems hard to not expect their acknowledgement because you love them and want them to notice the things you do to them. I know personally that when I make a grand gesture for someone I hope that they notice the time and effort I put into it, and recognize that. It may seem obnoxious to make it about me when I'm doing something for someone else, but when I am giving from the bottom of my heart to someone who I know is less fortunate, I would never expect anything in return. I see that as true giving, the kind were no matter who or what your giving to, your intention is not that you will get something in return. |
Chapter 9- Let Others Have the Glory |
Chapter 10- Learn to Live in the Present Moment |
I thought that this chapter was very insightful and overall eye opening. It made me take a step back and analyze myself and my actions. It is very easy to become absorbed in yourself when we live in a world built around idealism on social media. Where we look up to these figures who have the perfect lives and immediately want them for yourselves. We try to be like these figures and become so obsessed with every little thing we do or post. This type of world has turned us into ego centered human beings who constantly bring others down for their own satisfaction. I personally have had a moment where some have ‘stomped’ on my glory or in other words, made my moment about them. This frankly made me feel terrible, especially because it came from one of my close friends. After I had just won one of my golf tournaments with a score of 79 (breaking 80, which a few years ago I did not do a lot), my friend who I played with who shot an 85, didn't even congratulate for winning and immediately told me how we played the same golf but she just had a bad hole, costing her those 6 strokes. Six strokes is a lot in golf, so no we did not play the same or she would have shot a 79 like I did. It also didn’t help that her dad told me after we finished that my score just sounded better because it was in the 70’s, and my friend's score was only 6 strokes more which “isn’t a lot.” These comments made me feel very defeated inside and almost disrespected. I had just worked hard to play how I did and win, just to get put down. I would not want to make someone else feel like I did, so reading this chapter and reminding myself of this time has motivated me to pay attention to when I am being ego centered and not steal others' moments.
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The typical saying from an older generation to a younger generation was proved to be true after reading this chapter about living in the present moment. Life is too short to dwell on your past and the mistake you made, so ‘learn to live in the present moment.’ People should be finding joy in their new discoveries in life versus wishing they had a second chance. I personally write everything down on my calendar. I know that may seem like I’m playing my future and not living in the present, but I have a very busy schedule and there is no way to just completely live in the present without preparing for things in the future a little. I also cross off my days once they are completed on my calendar so I don’t look back at them and say, “Oh you forgot to do this that day,” and or “That day was terrible.” Once I cross off the day it almost feels like it is done and I don’t ever have to think about it again, unless it was a good happy memory. I also think trying to disconnect from our phones is a very good way to stay in the present moment. I feel like sometimes teenagers get so caught up in filming everything the do because they want to look back at it someday. Well before cameras were a thing, you had to use your memory and tell stories. Kids now have such a short attention span so it is hard for them to enjoy things in the moment without being on their phones because they get “bored.” I find things much more enjoyable when I am not on my phone, especially when I am around my friends. I think those two things are very big for me to help me live in the present moment.
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Chapter 11- Imagine that Everyone is Enlightened Except You |
Chapter 12- The next time you are in a discussion/argument, let the other person be right and take notice of the initial feeling that transpires |
I like the idea in this chapter that everyone you meet is for a reason and the encounters you have with them are all lessons for yourself. Every person is different, whether that is their personality, character, or overall aura. With these characteristics lessons are created and some people text you patience, some teach you compassion, while others teach how to be less judgemental. I think personally I have been taught to be less stubborn by many people. One time however, I was arguing with my mom about a certain way to do one of my chores, and I have a tendency to quickly snap at people whether they suggest something because I am stubborn. I sometimes get carried away and think that the way I am doing things is fine, restricting myself from any help whatsoever. However, most of the time the people who are giving me advice are older than me or generally have more experience in the topic so I should listen to them. The only time I give myself permission to be stubborn like this is when my parents are trying to give me golf help, because at the end of the day I have spent more time working on my golf game then them and now know more about that topic. Although, it is still bad that I am stubborn in the first place. Having these interactions with people have definitely helped me see my flaw in this area, and it has helped me work on it.
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This weekend I tried to pay specific attention to my conversation with people to see if I could catch myself when I was getting carried away in the argument, trying to force my opinion on the other person. My mom and I tend to argue quite a lot because I am stubborn and even though she has had more life experience than me, I still tend to think I am right. I thought she would be perfect for this book study prompt so I let her be right during most of our conversations over the weekend. When we normally argue, my mom tends to get mad at me, resulting in both of us getting worked up for no reason. I noticed that when I didn't force my opinion on her or argue, she was much happier to talk to me and just in general. She probably felt much better inside now, knowing that her daughter listened to her and believed she was right.
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Chapter 13- Do you ever have a reflective moment when you realize you are so very small in this vast world and really your 'drama' isn't that big of a deal? |
Chapter 14- Do you have a 'Mantra', a statement, that you make to yourself daily or weekly? |
I was just thinking about this exact question the other day, so yes, I do have reflective moments where I realize that everything I think that is a big deal in life truly isn't. Teenagers grow up nowadays with trends to follow, icons to worship, so many standards that they are expected to live up to. If they do not live up to or follow these standards then they automatically think they are not good enough and that the 'world is over'. I think that a lot of this thinking has to do with social media and how absorbed in these platforms our society has become. Sometimes I will catch myself worrying too much about the little things on these apps like who commented what, or who left me on opened, letting it affect my whole day. When I catch myself doing this I try to remind myself that it is not detrimental for my survival to have someone respond to me or comment something on my Instagram post. All of the things I tend to stress over tend to not be important in the long run, which is why I like to have these moments of realization so I can keep myself in check.
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I do not have one specific 'Mantra' but I do repeat a few phrases to myself daily to keep myself motivated throughout the week. One of them that I learned from my 8th grade teacher is, "Strive to be the best possible version of yourself". This statement is one of my favorites because it not only reminds my teacher, but it reminds me that life is too short to do everything half way. You were blessed with your body and to be able to live in it, so why not make the most of it and create the best possible version of yourself. Another mantra that I relate back to my golf game is "Follow your Passion- Fuel your Purpose" which is my theme in my portfolio his year. I like these statements because it pushes me hard in golf while still reminding me that I am working towards a goal because I love the joy golf brings to my life. My purpose in life is fueled by what I loved to do and by following my passion, I am giving myself a purpose to wake up everyday and live. I like to live by both of these 'Mantras' because it makes me more motivated and happy in life.
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Chapter 15- Be the first one to act loving or reach outThe message in this chapter is very meaningful to me because so far in my teenage years I think there have been multiple instances where friendships/relationships were lost due to a “small” miscommunication or disagreement. It is very easy to turn small stuff into big stuff just to protect our own egos. As a teenage girl, it is hard to stray away from drama even if you are not specifically involved in it. I feel like almost everyone is against you in some way, whether they are talking being your back or are simply just jealous. All of these things add up as a girl, and they can create false rumors which spread rapidly. This year I experienced a sort of break-up with one of the best friends. We have been friends since we were kids, and this year and last we had gotten super close. We would hang out all the time, and I really thought we had bonded more than I had with anyone else in my grade. Long story short, I’d thought we be besties forever, but obviously friends come and go and people change. I started to get closer with another girl which led to her making the assumption that I didn’t like her anymore. Without realizing it, I pushed her away which led to her making a new best friend as well. We were very distant for a while, and I hated it because the person I used to tell everything was just not the same anymore. It wasn’t that we didn’t like each other anymore, we had just grown apart and that’s ok. We have come to the conclusion that people grow, change, and move on. She is still in my life, and we mended our relationship. It may not be the same, but we recognize all of the memories we created together, and are still always there for eachother. However, all it took was something small like an assumption to distance us which shouldn’t have affected the relationship as much as it did.
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Chapter 16- Ask yourself a question, "Will this matter a year from now?"In a year from now I hope to be back in school, attending my junior year of highschool in person with my peers. I hope to have most of the safety protocols lifted so life feels normal again. And mainly, I hope that they have found a working vaccine for Covid so less people are being put at risk on the daily basis. These are my overall hopes for next year, but personally, I hope to be preparing for my future in golf and accomplishing my goals to get there. I want to play on a D1 college golf team after I graduate highschool, which can hopefully take me to the level of playing professionally on the LPGA tour. I have been working with new coaches trying to get different opinions on my swing and overall golf game. They have helped immensely, so hopefully in a year that time I am putting in right now will finally be seeing some good results. I should have already played in enough JGANC and JTNC tournaments to prepare me to play in a junior open or the IMG world tour. I want to be showcasing myself by at least the end of my sophomore year and middle of junior year, so I am ahead of the game going into senior year. There will be a lot of work that I am still putting in, further my potential with both golf and academics. I hope to still be maintaining a 4.0 GPA, and keeping a positive attitude in life. I hope that as I am still working towards my goals in golf, I am keeping a healthy balance with my social life and enjoying this time I have as a teenager with my friends. Highschool is meant to be fun and a birthplace for memories, so I hope I am not so stressed junior year that I can not pursue that.
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Chapter 17- Surrender to the fact that life isn't fair“Life isn’t always a fair game,” is a quote that’s stuck with me for a while, and I strongly believe with the message behind it. I feel like I have grown up in a generation where everyone wins, and it is all about the effort or participation. Which revolves around the idea that everyone is equal and deserves the same outcome regardless of the input. I think this question relates a lot back to equality versus equity. Equality is the idea that everyone gets the same amount of something, while equity is that everyone gets the amount that they need for their situation. Since I believe that not everything is fair, I think neither of them should be fought for. Unless the situation is where someone or something is being discriminated against.Other than that, I am a firm believer in the concept of working for what you have regardless of your background. It is not fair to give someone who does not work for anything in life, free stuff because they are simply “less fortunate.” Now, I mean this as unselfish as possible, I just think that not everyone is a winner, or deserves everything unless they worked for it. Life is not meant to be fair, fair as in equal or equitable at least 100% of the time. There may be certain things that people will argue need to be equal, but if someone has prepared themselves more and worked harder then they have the advantage, and I think that should apply to everything.
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Chapter 18- Do you take the time to be bored?This chapter of book study helped me understand what being bored actually is, and how more times than none it is a good thing to be bored. In our crazy lives nowadays it is easy to get caught up in what comes next, focusing only one the future. We tend to go from one thing to the next leaving us no time to actually relax, and when I say relax I don’t mean go one your phone or what television (which is what I typically do). Truly relaxing is taking a moment for yourself to breathe and let your mind be free. I find myself doing this when I listen to music. When I need a break from all of the things that need to get done, I will typically take a 10-15 minute break and still to a few of my favorite songs at the time that will take my mind off of life. This helps we feel less stressed and reconnect with my mind. I think I definitely should be “bored” more often just so I am able to process my thoughts and feelings which may help me be less indecisive and not make sporadic decisions.
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Chapter 19- Have you been taught to believe high stress is a positive thing? |
Chapter 20- Once a week, Write a heartful message? |
As much as I want to say no to this question, I think it very certain to say I grew up being taught that high stress is a positive thing. It wasn;t until freshman year of high school when I was in Morty’s class that I learned to be ‘mindful of the self.’ Before that I only knew the concept working hard and pushing yourself to the limit. Living in my brother’s shadow for awhile, you had to do everything to keep up with his successes, and this put you under a lot of unnecessary stress. I never thought that the high stress was actually high stress, I just assumed it came with hard work when that necessarily isn’t true. If you plan your days out right and manage your time then working hard at something isn’t stressful. Both of these things also decrease the chances of your stress which is one of the main solutions to preventing it. Like we had talked about in the previous chapter, taking a break to be “bored” also helps lower your tolerance to stress. If you experience stress too much because you grew up accustomed to it then your tolerance will be high. You have to understand when your stress is building up in order to lower your tolerance, or else it’ll keep growing without you realising. After learning about mindfulness of the self, I started to make lists and plan out my days on calendars so I could prevent my biggest stress of getting things done on time.
Chapter 21- Imagine yourself at your own funeralOne thing I would change about my life right now is my relationship with my mother. My mom and I do not get along super well, and I just wish we did. The negative energy wasted on us fighting is not worth it, and it makes our home environment toxic for everyone. She does so much for me, and I wouldn’t be where I am today without all of her love and support. The tension between us has heightened recently, which makes me feel like we are drifting apart. My dad brought up a good example of why I should try harder to be more patient with my mom. He was never close with his mom growing up simply because she was a horrible woman who treated her children poorly. He explained that I have a choice, and I do not want to grow up without my mom in my life. He knows we both love each other very much, but sometimes there is just some miscommunication with each other. I have the chance to make up for all the times my mom and I have disagreed, and after reading this chapter I am going to put more effort into this situation because life is way too short.
Chapter 23- "Experiment with Your Back Burner"“It puts our quieter, softer, and something most intelligent source of thinking to work for us on issues the have no immediate answer for.”
This quote relates a lot to what we had just discussed in class today, and it made me rethink my opinion on this topic. Personally, I believe that a back burner should be used for the least important things on your schedule. However, this quote talks about how the back burner is there for us to have extra time to process and truly work through the issues that aren’t able to be figured out immediately. I think that this technique for using your back burner is creative and actually incredibly smart. We all should not overlook our ability to use that extra source of thinking and tap into our intelligent side when times seem impossible. Like the famous quote says, “patience is a virtue,” the ability to be patient will eventually lead to good things in the end. Chapter 25- "Smile at Strangers, Look into Their Eyes, and Say Hello"My initial thoughts about eye contact and connecting with strangers were that it was a good idea, however during a global pandemic that sure is hard. When we are wearing our mask 24/7 at school and people can only see your eyes, it is easy for them to get the wrong impression about you. Your facial expressions are split in half, and you are not allowed to smile or laugh at the person you are talking to. I know from personal experience that it is unfortunate to have someone think something about you without even knowing who you are. I am a firm believer in not judging a book by its cover, and it is not fair to deem someone a “rude” person just by the look that you might think they are giving you. Eye contact is a good way to connect with people and it displays your confidence level as well. More people in the world should try to use eye contact to their advantage, widing their comfort level and horizons on different platforms.
Chapter 27- "Imagine the People in your Life as Tiny Infants & as 100 Year Old Results"As a highschool student who is surrounded by drama 24/7, I have had to let go of many situations that were not important to me or beneficial to my life. One situation that has stuck out to me the most is when one of my best friends, who I take everywhere because they do not have their license, left a huge mess in my car and did not apologize for it. I told her how she needs to be respectful of my stuff and keep her area of the car clean, and all she did as a response was make up excuses for why there was a mess. Instead of apologizing like a normal person and recognizing the fact that she had messed up, she tried to pin it back on me like I do the same thing. This whole situation was aggravating, and I was rude to her for a while. I soon realized that it was in the past and there was nothing I could do about it now. I know that she learned her lesson so I decided to move on with my life, and I discovered that by letting this go I was able to let go of the stress that came along with it.
Ch. 28- "Seek to Understand First"I feel like the idea of not seeking to understand is very common and most people are unaware that they do this. I have been oblivious to this multiple times before. It is hard for me to think of a specific situation when I did not seek to understand first because I feel like it happens too often on a small scale. My typical habit is to just tune out whatever the opposing person says because I do not believe that what they are saying is ever worth my time. Whenever I do this, I am typically not listening to what the other person is saying or taking the time to look where they are coming from. This just results in tension between the other person and I because there was no real resolution. I hope to improve this quality so I can resolve more conflicts instead of ignoring them.
Ch. 30- "Choose your Battles Wisely"I am a very orderly person with a minor OCD problem (self-diagnosed). One of my best friends, who I am with 24/7, is the exact opposite of me and does not care about the way things are organized. I take her to and from school everyday so most of the time her stuff is in my car. A few months ago, “lost my shhh” and completely lashed out on her. I was tired of constantly having to remind her that I didn’t like when she left trash in my car or threw her clothes all over the back seat, so I thought that yelling at her would finally get her attention. After I harshly approached the topic, I did not feel very good. I felt like it was unnecessary because it caused her to feel incredibly bad for what she had done. She claimed that she never heard me give her warnings or ask her to not do what she was doing, so it was all a miscommunication. If I wouldn’t have sweat the small stuff in this situation, I think it would’ve resulted in a better outcome for the both of us.
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The last time I wrote a letter to someone with gratitude was in the middle of quarantine when Morty challenged us to write a letter to some whose bond we were grateful for. This was the first time in awhile that I did something that allowed me to take time and appreciate what and who I had close to me in my life. It felt good to write out my affection for this person in words so they could truly understand how grateful I am for them, instead of just blowing it off like an everyday thing. Growing closer to them this year has made me a much happier person and taken so much drama and stress out of my life. Recognizing this person not only made my day but made theirs as well. I feel like I should do this more, once a week, like the book said because it would make the world a much happier place. People get too caught up in the speed of day to day life and don't take enough time to account for things that they are truly grateful for.
Chapter 22- Repeat to yourself, “Life isn’t an emergency”As a busy teenager nowadays, I feel like it is very easy to get caught up in the little things and overreact. With everything being posted on social media 24/7 we are so absorbed in other people’s lives that we forgot about the truly important things in life. Something that I tend to turn into an emergency that really is not that important is when people don’t respond in a certain amount of time or when they respond using certain words. I am an overthinking person, and when the main form of communication amongst teens is texting it is very easy to misunderstand people. I tend to take texts the wrong way and just assume that people mean the worst, which adds a bunch of unnecessary stress on me. I am already hard on myself enough with golf and school so I do not need this extra self-induced anxiety taking over my mind on a day-to-day basis.
Chapter 24- "Spend a Moment Everyday Thinking of Someone to Thank"While reading this chapter I immediately thought about meditation and yoga. On Wednesday mornings or at soccer when we have yoga sessions, I am able to get my quiet, relaxing moment. This however is probably the only time that I can willingly say I get a quiet moment during my busy schedule. These meditation periods are fairly long, and I feel confident that they help my mental health. Other than this, I have noticed that after I drop off Katie Martin after a long day of school and practice, I get to have a moment to myself in my car, all alone, quietly. This is a daily occurrence, and sometimes it is nice to just sit and reflect back on the day or turn off the music and simply rest my eyes. I think I need to work on this because even when I am sitting there in silence I am still stinking about whatever is on my mind. I easily let all of the stress catch up to me and it is not super healthy to be dwelling on everything even after it has passed.
Chapter 26- "Set Aside Quiet Time, Everyday"One person that I would like to thank in this moment and express my gratitude for is my step-grandfather, Frank. He is 85 years old, and has the heart of an angel. I am so grateful that God continues to bless us every single day with his health and even though he struggles sometimes, he is here and that is all that matters. Since day one I remember my grandfather, “grandpa frank” being there supporting me no matter what. He is a big old goofball who never fails to put a smile on my face, whether it is a simple joke or a reminder of a memory from when I was younger. Growing up I spent almost everyday with my grandpa because he picked me up from preschool and took me home. The time that I spent playing games with him and getting Taco Bell are moments I will cherish forever. I do not get to see my grandpa all the time because I am super busy, but everytime I see him on special occasions it makes me feel bad that I do not make enough time for him. Everyday is not guaranteed and I can not take for granted the time he has left.
Ch. 29- "Become a Better Listener"There are many types of listeners in the world, good and bad. Depending on the kind of listener you are usually affects the kind of listener you want to have. Someone that I can genuinely talk to, knowing that they will listen (just listen) is my boyfriend Bronson Burrow. However, someone that I can genuinely talk to knowing that they will truly hear what I am saying so they can provide a comforting response is my best friend, Dylan Degraff. And finally someone that I can genuinely talk to for hours on end that I know will listen and relate to me is my best friend, Natalie Johnson. I have different relationships with all of these people, which means I go to them at all different times. When I have certain questions or dilemmas, I know who to go to. All of these people have one thing in common however. They all genuinely care about me and listen when I need it.
Ch. 31- "Become Aware of Your Moods & Don't Allow Yourself to be Fooled by Low Ones"One of the faults that I have is letting my emotions weigh too much on my day to day activities. When I am in a bad mood it is very hard for me to let it go within a 24 hour period. Normally, I let it affect the rest of my day and make it known that I am in a bad mood by not being the most approachable person. This is a very bad habit of mine, and I am trying to work on it. A few weeks ago when I was stressed about AP BIO, I came to school with a very pessimistic attitude. I struggled on the last test we took (even though I studied), and it caused me to doubt myself. That whole day I was thinking about the test, and it made me really angry. This caused me to pay less attention in my other classes, and everything seemed like it was just not going my way. Last week on the other hand, I came to school in a good mood. It was harder for me to find bad things in life because I was happy. I had just spent the day with Bronson on Sunday, so Monday was easy considering I went to bed in a good mood.
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Chapter 32- “Life is a Test. It is Only a Test.”
This idea can easily be applied to my AP classes in my life. As a junior in highschool, these classes can be so overwhelming to the extent that it makes me feel like I’m living in a simulation. My purpose in life is to pass the “test” that I am living in, and what that means is to get a good grade on the AP exam at the end of the year. In order to do this I have to study extremely hard, pass the unit tests, and pay attention in class 24/7. Through looking at my classes like this I get stressed and overwhelmed very quickly. I put so much effort into these classes because there is a high level of pressure put on me. When it comes to the end result, the grades I get on the unit assessments are only for me to use as a reference for the future. Everything I do in my life will shape me to be a better person in the long run. In order to rise above my struggles with my mAP classes, I need to approach them with a growth mindset instead of the absolute mindset of everything being a test.
Chapter 33- “Praise and Blame are the Same Thing.”
This statement is not the easiest to sit with because I know that life is much easier when the people around you are happy. Everyone is nicer, calmer, and just overall happier when they are pleased. I do not think that I am a people pleaser simply because I know that I do not have the energy to put that much effort into others who do not always give it back. However, I do not ever hear this saying worded as, “Not everyone will be able to be pleased,” as it is more commonly shared as you, specifically will not be able to please everyone. This connotation of connecting the word you with the idea of pleasing others, makes it seem like it falls only in your hands. This makes the statement more negative because when we do not please others, we tend to feel as though we have let ourselves down. This however is not true because we are not responsible for everyone else’s baggage. I do think that regardless of this idea and the prompt, it is good and everyone should be more willing to be a decent human being.
Chapter 34- “Practice Random Acts of Kindness.”
A time when I completed a random act of kindness was when I payed for the people in the car behind me in the McDonald’s drive through. It was late on a Friday night after a football game, so there were an ample amount of cars in the line. I ordered my food like I would at any given night, and proceeded to pull up to the window to pay. At that moment, I noticed a woman crying in the car behind me. I was inspired to take action. Instinctively, I let the worker at the window know that I would be paying for the food ordered by the car behind me, having no idea what she ordered. I’ve had someone pay for my food before and it absolutely brightened my mood. I still remember it to this day. I knew for a fact that the lady would be caught off guard and it would cause at least a bit of spark in her day. This RAK sticks with me because of the overwhelming positivity and feelings of generosity that was created by the situation.